It been a bit long since I posted so I thought I’d just give a quick run through of the past two months.

Two months ago I got made redundant, so the first thing I did was cut a mohawk as in the last entry. Since then its pretty much been a big holiday. I’ve applied for a few jobs. Had an interview at Woosh for 3rd/4th level System Engineer but unfortunately my networking experience wasn’t up to it. That would have been a sweet job. Applied for a 1st level support position at AUT supporting students and staff, but they haven’t contacted me back on them so I’m still looking.

Here’s what I’ve been up to:

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Me and Nick are trademe whores. What can I say.

I wake up about 6pm after my last nightshift and find a text from him asking if I wanted to go on a roadtrip the next day. I said yeah sweet and texted the people I was buying my motox boots and helmet from and told them not to post them cos I was coming down country.

So I went for a drink with Becky and B-rad up at the trig. Sitting on the back of the utes watching the sunset over the Waitoki valley drinking beer is fucking mean (if you replace beer with something tastier anyway).

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So I’ve been lazy. Read Tigers new years excursions and decided I should get around to doing mine.

I was working new years eve so me and Brad, Nick, and Tesh decided to head up to Pakiri, one of the the meanest, whitest beaches NZ has for new years eve eve. They got there new years eve eve eve night and smashed some pipi’s (literally). Brad even cooked some up and ate them, got drunk and consequently vomited them back up. He no longer eats seafood.

So they had already been there for a day and a night by the time I got there after work on new years eve eve. They had been on a 8 day bender by this time, consuming a 40ounce bottle of Jack Daniels every night leading up to new years eve. Sometimes more than 1 and other times throwing in the odd bottle of Appleton Rum.

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So we’re at the pub on Thursday night, me Becky, Brad, Nick, and then Letitia turned up later on, and Amy came and hung out when she finished on the bar. Dunno where Shelley was? Think she had work the next day. The owner lady always tops up the jukebox with money from the till for us.

We’re sitting outside at the picnic table, cranking old school stuff like sabbath and eric clapton, all of us pretty wasted.

Topic of laughter for the night was saying smashed pipi, pipi smasher, because the week before. We had been offered (very stupidly) a gig at the Smashed Pipi pub in Mangawhai after some chick at a jam heard us (read: Joe) and thought we were awesome. Which we are, most definitely not.

Topic of laughter, because (as you will know if you already have a dirty mind) pipi representing the female genitalia, and smashing, the act of… fornication. Plus we are apparently 14 years old, thus making it funny. So you can imagine all the euphanisms we were coming up with, including telling threatening each other that we would smash the others pipi if they weren’t careful. Aren’t we evolved.

I get up to go and put on another song, I think I was trying to put on Deep Purple or Cream or something (there was no metal on the jukebox) and instead of hitting 81 on the thing, I hit 61. Which happened to be Vengabus, by the Vengaboys. Man did I feel like a dick, everyone cracks up laughing and points at me while I sit back down, and then they’re trying to make up a combination of my name and vengaboys, with gay taunts and what not. It was to be expected.

Then someone says, “Oh! The van!”, refering to my green van, “The Vengabus!”, “AHAHAHA” and everyone cracks up laughing again… classic…

THe Vengabus

Saturday when we’re on our way to get the engine, Brad texts tesh to ask what the plan was that night. She replies, “I reckon we all get drunk and take the vengabus to the smashed pipi.”

Hehe, good times…

Went to the Psycroptic concert on Saturday night. Was mean! Unfortunately Saturday morning I got a killer ear infection and went to the doctors. Had to pay $75 for him to tell me what I already new and get a script for some amoxycillin. Plus I still had a bit of headache and stuff from my sickness before that. So I didn’t drink or mosh to hard.

Shelley’s friend Ella is apparently into pop and stuff but she came anyway. Didn’t ask her if she liked it though. Pretty sure Shelley liked it, Nick and Brad just thought it all sounded the same, and didn’t like the growling vocals. Everyone is like that at the start though. They played Colour of Sleep and Skin Coffin and Lacertine Forest but unfortnately not my favourite song in the whole world, Cruelty Incarnate

Was still good though. Dawn of Azazel and Metal Tower supported them. The bassist in Metal Tower had a Warlock Bass Guitar.

Anyways, here’s some of their tracks if you haven’t heard them before:

They were out of shirts by the time we got there too which sucked. I was going to buy a hoodie for $40 but forgot… (??)

Unfortunately, I am a lazy fuck and I never got around to putting my speakers and central locking cable through, before Sunday but no one else but Nick came with me. Brad went riding, as did Shelley and Tesh. It was a mean sunny day, had a bit of a jam, got yelled at by Nicks mum for distrubing the neighbours, and left at about noon.

I love roadtrips. Grabbed some subway at Bombay. Got down there at about 3, met the dude in New World carpark in a suburb called Gate Pa (wtf?). Checked the guitar out, no wobbly neck, sweet as. Dude gave me some cash for gas which was cool of him, and we decided to go for a drive and check out the Mount (Manganui). Quite a few people on the beach. Nice girls everywhere, including one of my types (black tshirt and jeans on a hot day) lol.

There were tonnes of dicks just driving round and round in their peice of shit cars though.

Left there, Nick had a sleep in the back, while I stalked some chick in a white skyline all the way back to Papakura. Don’t remember what time we got home. Tried out the guitar, its got a mean sound but only on that amp for some reason. Sounds like crap on Nicks amp.

Then stayed up until about 4am playing Far Cry 2 (awesome game).

So I went to Nicks dads warehouse/factory thing yesterday, turned up and Riki was there too. They were so excited cos they just got a whole bunch of free shit from the people next door that were moving out. Pulled it out of the skip they had. Got belt sanders, jigsaws, boxes of electronic components. Tables, desks, all sorts. And a whole box of alcohol, like wine, gin, woodstock and stuff. These guys were throwing everything! (no kitchen sink, but there was a toilet seat.)

They’re setting up the factory as like a private workshop for the various hot rods they have and our cars etc etc. Got an engine hoist and they’re getting a car hoist and stuff.

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Had no friends cos Nick and Brad went out west to some party, I didn’t wanna go out there. Would’ve been shit.

So I went to my parents to drop off some stuff and along the way stopped in at Becky’s where Shelley was. They wrote this list thing of all these things to do, random as shit. Went and got a feed, got some sand (it was on the list). Seriously those chicks and liquor makes for some soul-cringingly quirky times, jeez.

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Or 2 for that matter!

Went to my mate Nicks last night and we went to the supermarket to get some beer and I saw a girl who I used to work at BP with there. Anyway on the way back to his we can see this bonfire at the back of his farm. This huge one, it actually looked like a house or barn on fire, not a bonfire. So we get back to his place and Palethorp was there, with his V8 Hilux. They backed it into the carport under the light, and we had a look at the engine.

God damn it is clean, lexus 1UZFE transplant into it, it is so nice. No wires and crap everywhere, nice blue tubes for the intake and the radiator hoses, huge pod filter. Fucking gorgeous.

Anyways Iydden and his girlfriend Angeline turn up and said the neighbours are having a bit of a bonfire party. Then Brad turns up so we decide to go check it out. Throw all the booze in the back of Palethorps truck along with a couch/seat out of nicks van, and go down the barn to get nicks V8 hilux. Palethorps truck sounds pretty damn awesome.

Anyways we open up Nicks shed and there’s his beast sitting there ready to go, so we pull that out, its even louder than Palethorps truck cos it has a 350 chev in it! Put another couch in the back of that thing (which the tray on it wasn’t bolted on yet – just new), and they tried to make me go in there to keep it on the back. But knowing my luck it would’ve fallen off with me on it going up a hill or something. So I jump in the cab with Brad, Nick, Shelley and her friend Erin, and we take off down the farm.

I can only imagine what these kids were thinking when they hear our trucks roaring down the race and then see us go into the paddocks sliding fucking sideways all over the place, big rooster tails of mud and shit. We go into the other paddock and Palethorp makes it up the hill fine in 2 wheel drive cos he’s got big tyres on there but Nick’s racing slicks didn’t quite make it. We tried thrice, even with a big runup but we just got halfway up and it would spin. Clicked it into 4wd and it was sweet. Smashed up there, backed up to the fence near the fire, pulled off the seats and sat there by the fire drinking beer. Eventually we got sick of their dance music and hip hop shit so we cranked on the metal.

It was pretty awesome, the sound of those V8’s is wicked, some kid tried to show off the noise his rotor made, but I don’t think anyone cared after the V8’s…

So yeah, that’s how you gatecrash a bonfire party…

OK this dream was really fucked up. First of all there’s this massive robot right, and I’m out my parents house with my mum and brother and we are watching out the front door as it grabs parts of houses with its huge hands and there’s people inside. Then it starts coming towards our house. We slam the front door but it can still see us (thermal vision or something) and it grabs part of the house as we run away from the front door, but mum is too slow and it grabs her, amongst the debris from the house killing her.

Then I find out its on an island similar to Lost and there are others and the robot is somehow one of the monsters on the island.
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