So I don’t understand really how the creationists get so uptight about evolution. I mean shit, can’t the creationists just say that evolution happens because God wills it so? I mean, is that not sufficient? They have to go all crazy and build a whole museum with people and dinosaurs running around together?

I think if there were people and dinosaurs walking around at the same time it would have been mentioned in the fucking bible.

You believe the world’s 12 thousand years old? “That’s right.” Okay, I got one word to ask you. A one word question. Ready? “Uh-uh.” Dinosaurs.

You know, the world’s 12 thousand years old and dinosaurs existed, and they existed in that time … you’d think it would have been mentioned in the fucking Bible at some point. “And lo, Jesus and the disciples walked to Nazareth. But the trail was blocked by a giant brontosaurus … with a splinter in his paw. And O, the disciples did run a-shrieking: ‘What a big fucking lizard, Lord!’ But Jesus was unafraid, and he took the splinter from the brontosaurus’s paw, and the big lizard became his friend. And Jesus sent him to Scotland where he lived in a loch for O, so many years, inviting thousands of American tourists to bring their fat fucking families and their fat dollar bills. And O, Scotland did praise the Lord: ‘Thank you, Lord. Thank you, Lord. Thank you, Lord.’” – Bill Hicks

I didn’t actually know that according to the bible the world is only 12,000 years old, worked out from adding all the peoples ages up all the way back to Adam and Eve…? And anyway, if everyone on earth came from Adam and Eve, mating, without any intervention by God as we are supposed to believe, shouldn’t we all be horribly inbred? And isn’t incest a sin of some sort? How the fuck can that happen?

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 23rd, 2008 at 12:17 pm. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.